May 25, 2006

Political Blue Balls

Stephen Harper is running around town saying nobody loves him. Well, Stephen, you aint getting any love from Fuddle Duddle either. Why is it that nobody loves Stephen Harper?

Harper’s Tories got endorsed by every major newspaper, including the Globe for the second straight time, the Post, the Gazette, and even La Presse, Quebec’s federalist newspaper. There was no shortage of Conservative Political Masturbation, it was what I imagine the eighth circle of hell would look like. (If y’all are wondering, the eighth circle is reserved for among others, panderers and hypocrites) The CBC was ok to both sides while the CTV and Mike Fluffy and Robert Fief got their reward with a Bush interview weeks after the election.

Now Harper is mad. 2 months ago, he was the new boss in town. Everybody loved him. He was getting some from everywhere, Alberta, BC, Quebec, even Dalton wanted to meet him. He was telling the press to go sit on his middle finger and they didn’t seem to mind…at first.

Oh my how times have changed. After 3 months in office, Harper couldn’t get any no more. Gordo said nuh-uh because of Kelowna. Ralph Klein wants out of equalization. Dalton got “snubbed.” Even Jean Charest, always dependable for a booty call wasn’t putting out over Kyoto and the Gun Registry. Now the media doesn’t wanna hear Harper anymore. Cry me a river Stephen…better, ask Paul Martin how the media stopped fawning the day he became Prime Minister, welcome to 24 Sussex. So take your message directly to the people. Once they hear your lies in person, even they will stop putting out, and those blue balls will be on the first bus back to Stornoway.

5 Commentaires:

Blogger Jason Townsend a dit...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

5/25/2006 10:24 PM  
Blogger Jason Townsend a dit...

I think there is an element of petulence here; as Kinsella said, you can go over the heads of the media but it's pretty stupid to announce you're doing it. But by and large I think it's consistant with Harper's overall strategy of crapping all over the press in the hopes that his past and potential voters don't like that media very much; he could be right.

It's important that we take advantage of the media slack and remind Canadians of Harper's very good reasons for hiding from scrutiny.

5/25/2006 10:27 PM  
Blogger James Bowie a dit...

Creative title.

5/26/2006 1:03 AM  
Blogger cat mutant a dit...

oh no! this will surely lead to the end of the conservatives!

the average canadian cares so much about the ottawa press gallery, this issue will surely topple the government

5/26/2006 10:29 AM  
Blogger Pedro a dit...

Love it!

5/26/2006 11:41 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home